commencement.

One of the speakers talked about how to graduate is to end, and this was merely a beginning, a commencement.

Here's to the all time greatest high school experience, full of the greatest people ever. 

& hopefully an equally incredible future. 

someone press pause.

I've anticipated college my entire life.
I've anticipated graduation ever since my seniors left me last year.
but now it's all here. today, right now, it's over.

Hi, I'm Brittney, and I absolutely loved high school.

I lived it up completely.
I have no regrets.
I just hope the memories will last.

Plus life will just get better, right?

#pictueralignmentonbloggerisimpossible

"who says we have to let it go"

Yay for high school, and for High School Musical 3 lryics. 

I still miss my Seniors from last year. Looking through last years yearbook tonight, tears definitely streamed down my face as I saw the class of '13. Because they're not just faces, they're endless memories.

...the kids from calc lab that we always joked about kissing with, I'd laugh so hard
...the sweetest girl I've ever met who was always so willing to help me understand during calculus
...my cross country girls, and our runs together
...that one girl who drove me absolutely mad, I'm even kinda missing her
...the mural groupies, we spent so much time together
...the best friends: the weirdest, funniest, craziest, greatest group of guys i've ever known
...the cutest girl that I bonded with in crazy Mrs. Snow's chemistry class
...my buddies from Hamilton's spanish class #yachtclub, skiing adventures with them
...the kids from student council. endless memories attached there..

this list never ends.. high school has been so so so good to me.

I know I'll love college, I'm still stoked out of my mind for it.
but I am going to just have to keep looking forward, because whether I realized it or not in the moment, I loved high school, and looking back hurts so so bad.

I have all these memories that I never ever want to forget. They're the ones that have made me who I am today. They're people who have changed my life. But they're simply part of the past now.

& it hurts so bad that in just a couple days, it will be a whole 'nother round of goodbye's. The amount of faces that I'll look back on while the tears pour out will double. Because I love the class of '14 so so much also.
& I'm not crying because I wish I was there again. I am done with high school, but I sure do love PG a whole lot, there's no where else I'd rather have gone. & I'm incredibly grateful for every single one of those faces.

High school, I did absolutely love you.

Carpe Diem.

Looking back at high school, I'd tell you they were the best days of my life. 

Everyone says college is better. [don't wait around for college while in high school, and don't dwell on high school in college.]

I've got some incredible things in store for me this summer, and I'll only get to live it once. 

My freshman year of college will only happen one time. 

& that can be said about every other year, and day. There is never a chance to relive it.  

Make every day of your life, part of the best days of your life. 

Who said they can only last one chapter

...although, high school yearbooks might always make me cry. #ilovehighschool

Spiritual Sunday: Round I

What have I learned during my senior year?

I've learned to rely on God.

It was towards the end of Christmas break, almost the half way point of the school year.
Everything was weighing down, and especially Presidential duties. Because no matter how hard I worked to be the best President I could be, I still felt like I wasn't doing enough, like I still wasn't making a difference. I prayed and read my scriptures and tried to figure out what was going on, why I didn't feel successful through my endeavors.. why I couldn't do enough.

& it took a while, but lots of prayers later, it clicked. That being the President, was a big job, and I'd been doing it alone. At that point my perspective shifted, rather than asking Him to help me, or asking Him what else I could do, I decided to simply rely on Him: promising that I would continue to work and do everything I possibly could, but allowing Him to help me out by making up the difference.

& He did, and things did change. Because suddenly I wasn't serving as President alone, I was serving with my Savior.

It's nice to meet you.

considering the blog has actually now been published and publicized an introductory only seems fitting!

I'm 5"9 but I love being tall so I sometimes lie and say almost 5"10. 

My hair is naturally pretty light blonde and I take too much pride in that. 

I've always described myself as a happy person, but let's be real, I'm not always happy, I'm only human. 

I'm a runner, and have no athletic competitive bone in my body. 

I prefer adventures over lunch dates and I really like the summertime. 

I'm psyched out of my mind to attend BYU.

#halfzoobstatus

and I think that'll do for now. 

I'm getting sold on simplicity, I mean this is a blog, I feel like you'll come to know me pretty well.

Senior Year: live it up.

That's what everyone advised me, so I did just that.

I missed my graduated friends a whole lot, but I didn't let it hold me back.
Because of it, I grew close with so many new people. Endless new friendships, Juniors, Seniors, and I let my friendships that I have already grow so much stronger.
The importance of friends isn't exaggerated in the slightest.
Have fun, be involved, live it up, and don't take hard classes.
Senioritis is bad enough as is.
Also, procrastinate nothing. I have five very smart friends who got a real bad case of senioritis and almost didn't graduate-- guys, it's a real struggle, don't let it get you.

God Knows You.

It's cool the way Heavenly Father truly knows your heart.

How I read something today and immediately began to feel inadequate, [everyone's tweeting about how great of President's they were, they got spotlighted in a magazine, they did this and this and this.. etc. etc. etc..]. trying to brush it off and not let it weigh me down.. but He knew how it was bothering me.

and He answered that in the most perfect little way possible, [going to Young Women's and receiving the sweetest most sincere compliments, and a leader who works at the school talking about the role I've played.. and looking back over the incredible year we've had] reminding me I was good enough, and everyone's different so there's no need to compare.

Sometimes, when you're doing what's right, He's there for you even before you have to ask.

1:06am.

Experiencing every sort of emotion right now, simply put.

It was a super amazing incredibly fun night. 

You never know what you have until it's gone. 

I'm not sure which situation that's pertaining to. 

Present or future. 

Whether a boy or just your high school experience or your friends.

I know I miss him, and just maybe I'll miss high school a bit too, well, at least all my friends.

the odds have been ever in my favor.

I listen to the same three Taylor Swift songs on repeat.

I sing along, and I blast them and I smile and it's good. 

I accept that I kind of miss him, a lot. 

I am incredibly grateful though, because I am living the life. Seriously. 

This summer will be THEE greatest. 

Sports Camp Counselor, yesss please! 

BYU? I am stoked out of my mind. There may have never been a soul who was as excited for college as I am. #zoooob

My job right now? Yes, coaching 5-12 year olds in track is the greatest, way flexible, so chill. 

Working next school year? Yes, I'd love to. Student Advisement Center. I am blessed. 

I am so so so so so blessed. 

Lately it's smelt like summer and that gives me zero reason to complain. 

#confessiontweet

do i still cross over your mind when that moon is high and full in the sky, like it is tonight?

because i can't help but let it remind me of you.

...and i secretly love that.#ct

memory lane.

it's hard not to let the memories of him flood back this time of year.

the spring rain storms

end of the year choir concert

graduation prep

the full moon

sno shacks opening up again

one year ago

prom season

mothers day and calling missionaries


I'm not a missionary girlfriend, we haven't written for quite some time, and I was moving on.
time is going by quick, and I'm getting anxious for homecomings rather than farewells.
just because I'm curious to know where we'll stand, or if we'll stand at all?

clean & simple.

I like things simple, clean, and new.
I suppose everyone does, but that's definitely the reason I'm anticipating college so much.
New everything: new house, new closet, new organization, new homework, new teachers, new life.
It all just seems so crisp and clean. I've got one more month to stick out, and some big dreams ahead of me.
Goals make me feel new, and more crisp when I can succeed in them. Here's to a new blog, new goals, and soon enough, a new life. Simplicity though.

1. Wear lipstick more often.
2. This time through the scriptures, truly study.
3. Create lots more often.

more introductory.

I love to run and cross country was one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life.

I loved high school. 

then I got an awful case of senioritis. 

On the first day of my senior year. 

It was ironically also the day I said goodbye to a best friend as he headed off to Alabama. 

The summer before Junior year was the greatest, because I had the greatest friends, and a big crush. 

Senior year was hard at first, because saying goodbye to all your Senior friends is hard, but it turned out to be absolutely fantastic. 

I'm still considering changing my twitter bio to "I'm Brittney and I have commitment issues so don't date me"

I really really reeally like summer.

I'm LDS, and I love the gospel so very much. 

...pronounced?

I guess a few of them have pieced together and begun to make sense of each other.

I thought I'd moved on for real, for good, but somehow you came sprinting back through my mind and into the picture once again, and you weren't even the one who brought yourself there.

I got lucky and I'm going to state track. We're adding it to my list of pure euphoric moments.

All I wanted to do was tell him about it, that I'm going to state! but I've been strong for the past 37 days, I shouldn't give in now. It wasn't just that though.. it's everything lately. I'm not forgetting those nights up on the swing, that one imparticular. I'm not forgetting trips to the water tower. It's all still so present, while time flies by.

I miss my brother a whole dang lot. Guys, he is one of the greatest humans in the entire world. Maybe I'm biased but seriously, his wife will be a lucky one.

and as for you, that last little piece of my heart. As of right now you don't quite fit anywhere, you're just like a puddle that can't be contained and is soaking into absolutely everything, definitely very present, and I'm just not quite sure how to contain it.

unpronounced words

there are so many words in me right now
they're thoughts and feelings and emotions of every sort.
some are hiding in the back corner of my heart
and some are screaming from every area of my brain

some have managed to put themselves together, at least into phrases
but most of them are just still trying to figure out where they belong, or how
that's why when I try to tell you, none of it makes sense

the ones who have already figured it out are all locked up though..
and for some reason I've vowed to keep them there for 15 more months.
but in 15 months will they even matter at all?

the background called... Part II

disclaimer: I don't just go around breaking hearts, nope, defs not.
I've gotten my heart broken, and there have been plenty of boys I swooned over and defs didn't end up with, and many tears were shed, just like any other girl. that [previous post] was just the story towards a few where the liking was mutual.. until I broke it off, and I guess that's the difference with me, the reason I always feel so guilty. It's because for me it's not a long slow 'break-up', it usually comes as an instantaneous realization. and it truly is awful.

except for that one time. when the liking was mutual.. and I waited and waited for the day I'd wake up with that realization. five months passed, the realization never came, and he left on the mish for a couple years. 9 months later.. and there have been a couple close calls, but in reality, that realization still hasn't come. 

the background called my love life.

I feel like you deserve a personal apology.
Except for the fact that when I say personal, I mean all of you...
because with this little heart the stories tend to end up the same..

My name is Brittney and I get really really excited when I think about marriage and having my own little family one day. I also have a heart that loves too quickly and too deeply.
It's a perfect little picture in my head, and very apparently too good to be true. But still, I feel like I've worked to become the person who would deserve the man I dream of, so I suppose I'll keep dreaming until it's a reality.
I also think I know exactly what my husband will be like. Clearly that's also super naive and unrealistic of me, but I have that little picture in my head.. and every now and then I meet someone who just maybe it would work with, and sometimes they don't fit that little mold, but my heart trips anyway.
Maybe you were my best best guy friend and I loved to flirt with you, or you were everything I wanted, like you fit the description perfectly, or you made me so unbelievably happy that I couldn't help but let myself fall into a relationship with you, because normal friendships don't give you butterflies and unexplainable happiness.
But then somewhere along the way, it would click in my mind that whatever we were, or were trying to be, just wasn't clicking, probably making me seem like the most shallow human-being in the world. Because sometimes it was as simple as waking up one random morning with the realization, this isn't it. and I dreaded it.. that moment and that realization, and avoided it at all costs, and for some reason it always still came.

Can I try to defend the shallowness of it though? Because when I woke up, or kissed you, or flirted with your best friend, or whatever the situation was, I didn't love you any less in that moment. Not at all actually.. If anything I loved you more. I just realized it wasn't quite right.. and maybe one day in our future's the bumps will smooth over or we'll grow differently, and you know that potentially could be back towards each other, but that moment of realization was knowing I shouldn't waste your time...
Because why should I pretend to be the one for you after I had already realized I wasn't... am I justified in saying that?

JJLRKC

blog fetus.

this is my titleless blog.
it's been so greatly anticipated, crazy that this first little post is actually being written.
I'm sure it won't be the first post though. too weird and random.. it's just a little bit of everything but apparently they made the cut:

//I've picked up on some random life lessons lately, thing like, "just because the pictures make you look fat doesn't mean you really are." (seriously who would've thought that shirt for senior pics would turn out to be such an awful idea.) You just gotta brush that one off.
//I've considered changing my twitter bio to say "Hi, I'm Brit, and if I think you have relationship potential save yourself the pain and just admire from afar." ah yeah okay, that sounded conceited, really I just think I have commitment issues or something.
//but then I'm selfish and I actually think, hey [insert name of that dang fine young man right here]. You really honestly truly think I'm good looking? Ohmyheavensmydreamsjustcametrue.. what are we if we're not dating. (jk, I saw the kid once and haven't seen him since)
//I'm not getting over the fact that I've kissed five boys. [well there's a fun fact about me] You're probably mocking because it's really not that many, but it's sounding like way too many to me. #promisei'mnotdown
//I'm almost but not quite 18. and I'm just a little girl. Why is everyone getting married???
//I thought I had me all figured out but I'm not quite sure I do.

I'm just getting into blogging and to say I'm absolutely obsessed is an understatement.

Holla mi amigos, I'm Brittney, and I'm back in the blogosphere.

Preface.

I'm Brit, from right over here. Simple Serendipity, Now is the Start, the blondybrit or sheisbrit url... 

However you may have known it, that was my little blog where my thoughts rambled on for quite some time. 

I fell in love with journals and the blogging faded, but eventually I realized how much I miss it, so here I am again! 

A new blog has been long anticipated with absolutely zero time for that to become a reality. I gave up on finding time, and created a completely blank one titled ..........., while names were brainstormed and it began to grow as the drafts piled up, anticipating the day they'd actually get posted, onto the blog & finally ready to see the world.


It's disturbing how much that could've resembled a pregnancy story.


Therefore, presenting you with the fetus phase.

(good, we got past any awkwardness.)